A Nearby Cat

I'm sitting on my futon watching tv ... Hell's Kitchen to be exact ... when SkitSkat, our black and white cat, comes to join me. It's a pretty common occurrance. She doesn't really want to be petted. The occassional scratch of the head or chin is allowed. Mainly though, she just wants to snuggle in somewhere and be near. She doesn't always stay long, but sometimes she settles in for most of the evening.

It always makes me smile. Her purring when I scratch her head or the little noises she makes when she sleeps are quiet reminders of her presence. But she doesn't demand any attention. She just wants to know I'm nearby.

It's a perfect example of what I recognized in Quirkyalone. I need my solitude. It's important to me, but it is nice to have someone to share with and protect that solitude. I thought at one point I'd found a person with whom I could do that, but eventually I realized that it wasn't the same thing for him. I need to have my own space, my own world that doesn't require anyone else's input or approval. At the same time, it's important to have people who are invited in to join that world, who come for a short stay or who visit for a longer time, who influence and change my world.

But the thing is, I still need my solitude that doesn't require me to be anything other than me.

"I hold this to be the highest task for a bond between two people:
that each protects the solitude of the other."

Rainer Maria Rilke